Zombie Apocolypse with special guest star George Clooney.

Emailed to Amanda with the subject "possibly the weirdest dream I've ever had" on June 28, 2006.

It's the end of the world and I've found refuge in this huge multi-floored mansion with about 30 other people. The problem is that the mansion is also infested with zombies. Ape-zombies, to be exact. This is my first night in the mansion. I'm being shown around and told the rules about not triggering the zombies. At night, everyone sleeps in the freight elevator which has been retrofitted with an elaborate electronic security system built and run by George Clooney. So, I grab a blanket and make myself a makeshift bed on the floor of the freight elevator. There is a man next to me in a weird silver puffy suit. Somehow I realize that he is not a man but a space-robot-zombie attempting to masquarade as a man to infiltrate our safe elevator! Damn him! Earlier, his space ship crashed onto the roof of the elevator and he snuck in, undetected. I pulled off his disguise and he was wearing multiple layers of flannel shirts. Then I beat him up.

The next morning I was kidnapped by the neighbors across the street. Apparently the world outside the zombie mansion has gone on a usual. A man and a woman who are not a couple keep me all day. I am not there of my own volition. They take me shoe shopping and buy me three pairs of shoes. When we return to their house, I'm free to go, but I have to take a pair of shoes with me. I open the trunk of the car and select a pair of shiny, black, patent-leather flats with cut outs on the sides. They are hideous, and three sized too big, but they are the best of the selection.

I walk across the street, back to the zombie house. Apparently, during the day, we have run of the first three floors of the house. No zombie threat during the day time. I sit down on the couch and watch some t.v . Someone brings in lunch. Two girls come into the living room. The first girl is a chemical genius who is constantly concocting new zombie-killing agents. She has a supersoaker loaded with her new mixture and goes upstairs in search of a zombie to test it on. I hear her kill the zombie. When she returns, she's licking her fingers and tossing the zombie bones in a bag. "Ew, you ATE the zombie?" "Yep."

Dusk comes and the house morphs into the house I grew up in. I walk past Jeff who is now sleeping on the living room couch and think, "I guess we've determined that it's safe enough to sleep outside of the elevator." I walk into my old bedroom where Michelle is sleeping. I flip on the light and then quickly turn it off. I sit down on the edge of the bed to tell her my crazy kidnapping-shoe-shopping story, but it's too late. I've triggered the zombies.

and then I wake up.